Adam: I just bought the matrix online
Me: I bought the matrix at best buy years ago

Adam: in actuality, i bought the matrix online, online
Me: ITS A MATRIX WITHIN A MATRIX!
Adam: like a little russian nesting doll
Adam: with sunglasses and double uzis

Who:	adamg,  mmackey (more info…)

Chance: *loud and odd whistle*
Me: What the fuck was that?
Chance: It was a whistle...
Me: That was a rhetorical question
Chance: Then why'd you ask?
Me: ...Cause...it's a rhetorical question...it would be a thought if I didn't ask.
...
Me: Do you know what a rhetorical question is?
Chance: Was that a rhetorical question?
Me: No...It's an inquisitive one, because I'm seriously starting to question whether or not you know what rhetorical means.

Who:	mmackey, Chance (Coworker) (more info…)

[After learning about birth control in health class, my friend John and I were talking.]

Darcey (expecting the answer of 'a condom'): What are you going to use when you have sex?
John: A vagina!

Who:	PsycheDemele, John (more info…)

Shannon: So while I was at Stop & shop I saw a graduation card there
Shannon: And it had a guinea pig
Shannon: And under it it said "oh crap i haz 2 get a j0b nao"
Adam: New greeting cards
Adam: brought to you by
Adam: LOLMARK

Who:	adamg, Shannon (more info…)

Cameron: "Have you ever gone skydiving?"
Christopher: "I've never gone. Have you?"
Cameron: "No."
Christopher: "Would you?"
Cameron: "If the plane was on fire."

Jick: "Does 'biweekly' mean twice a week or every two weeks?"
Xenophobe: "Yes."
Riff: "I think it could mean either depending on context."
Jick: "I think that pretty much renders it useless as a word."

[Monica is playing a computer game.]
Ron: "You're gonna lose."
Monica: "Could you not give away the ending?"

Who:	ron,  monizzle (more info…)

Professor: "A student once asked me, 'How can I graduate?' My answer was, 'You can either work hard to get good grades in your classes, or you can hack the registrar's system and change your grade... which is probably much easier.'"

(Felisia is building sets for an MIT play)
Felisia: "According to most of the male techies, I'm majoring in 'pretty'."
Adam: "HAY BABY. CAN I PLUG MY SOLUTION INTO YOUR EQUATION?"
Felisia: "The best math pickup line I've heard has been 'I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves'."
Adam: "HOW DO I KNOW SO MANY DIGITS OF PI BUT I DON'T HAVE YOUR NUMBER?"
Felisia: "That's kinda terrible..."
Adam: "HAY PRETTY LADY, I WANNA BISECT YOUR ANGLE."
Felisia: "No."
Adam: "YOU MUST BE THE SQUARE ROOT OF 2, SINCE I FEEL IRRATIONAL WHEN YOU'RE AROUND ME."
Felisia: "That... that's just horrible."
Adam: "I LIKE THE AREA BOUNDED BY YOUR CURVES."
Felisia: "Wha?"
Adam: "FEEL LIKE CONVERTING OUR POTENTIAL ENERGY INTO KINETIC ENERGY, BABY?"
Felisia: "Please stop."
Adam: "Never."

Who:	adamg,  lisiT (more info…)

Me: Ugh you haven't seen any movies I like
Megan: I'm sure I have. I just cant recall if I've seen alot of trilogies.
Me: Star Wars?
Megan: Nope
Me: Either of them?
Megan: uh..no.
Me: Back to the Future?
Megan: Nope
Me: The Matrix?
Megan: No I watched like 20 minutes of the first one and didn't like it.
Me: ....I think a little bit of me just died inside
Megan: Sorry
Me: Jurassic Park?
Megan: Yes! Finally one I've seen! I can say I have seen BOTH Jurassic Parks!
Me: There's 3 of them...
Megan: ...Oh.